THE other day I was looking at the place in the back kitchen of the farmhouse where the bakestone used to stand 50 odd years ago when we had it removed and replaced with a Rayburn cooker.

It occurred to me that because we always called it a “backstone”, it was a good many years before I realised that although it was used for making oatcake, its name actually came from the baking, hence why it was called a bakestone and not a backstone. Just another of my useless bits of information. I have to confess if I was writing articles in those days I would have written backstone; but now I know better.

It may be fashionable today to go in for exotic foods; but never having been a follower of fashion, if I could have some oatcake spread with farm butter and accompanied with mild Lancashire cheese then that would do me. I hope to goodness my dietician doesn’t read this, but if she does, it’s all wishful thinking.

You may remember last time I told you about how, when we were lads, my pal’s father told me his old uncle had advised burying a dead sheep under the vines to grow really good, if not the best grapes.

You will perhaps also remember me telling you about EU bureaucrats coming out with a regulation preventing farmers from doing what they had been doing for centuries, namely burying their dead animals.

Well just think of this: wouldn’t it be a hoot if the wine swilling bureaucrats discovered that their favourite tipple came courtesy of vines grown after dead sheep had been buried underneath. What do you suppose they would do? Withdraw the regulation or change to beer or cider? If they were to change to beer, perhaps we may discover a secret about how the best hops are grown. Oh well, as I say, it’s being so cheerful that keeps us going.

Incidentally, why did Mrs Beckett and Co at DEFRA rush with open arms to embrace that regulation?

No evidence to support a problem of pollution was produced. Could it just be something Brussels civil servants came up with during a slack fortnight. I say fortnight because it runs to 95 pages.

I am indebted to an old fried for pointing me in the direction as to why the top people at DEFRA are always so eager to welcome whatever comes out of Brussels whether it benefits our farmers or not.

Do you suppose that the reason could be that the politicians in question crave power and because the power now rests in Brussels, these people are eager to latch onto whatever comes out of Brussels, in order to give them the opportunity of power over us mortals?

The thought wasn’t mine for, as you know only too well, I only ask the questions.

Dialect word: Nesp, meaning nip off the stalks etc. from blackcurrants, white currants and gooseberries.

Thought for the day: We will all be better off when the power of understanding replaces the understanding of power.